Wipe Away Your Sins
LIMITED EDITION: CHORES
Ever want to get a group together to clean people's windows so you create an online post called "Wanna Go Streaking???" thinking it will attract neat freaks but instead it attracts nude freaks and when you explain the miscommunication they look devastated like their drooping junk was a beautiful gift to share with the world and you wish you had something to give them to lift their bare-ass naked spirits? Introducing Streak Free Sunnies.
NO SLIP. NO BOUNCE. ALL POLARIZED. ALL FUN.™️
1 NO SLIP
We use special grip coating to construct our frame to help eliminate slippage when sweating.
2 NO BOUNCE
Our frame is snug and light-weight, with a comfortable fit to prevent bouncing while running.
3 ALL POLARIZED
Glare-reducing, polarized lenses and UV400 protection that blocks 100% of those harmful UVA and UVB rays.
4 NO LEOPARDS
Plus, no one wearing goodr running sunglasses has ever been attacked by a leopard (as far as we know).
IT'S THE TEN CLEAN COMMANDMENTS!
Clean your dishes so you don't get roaches.
Recycle or you're trash, atrocious.
Scrub your nasty disgusting bathroom.
Clean your carpet, or you suck like a vacuum.
Sort clothes into 'Clean, Donate, Sell.'
Declutter your home, hoarders go to hell.
Hit the kitchen, get rid of all splatter.
Wash your sheets, they might have fecal matter.
Put on a pair of Wipe Away Your Sins.