Modern Day Snake Oil

MEET THE OG

1 NO SLIP

Constructed with a special grip-coated frame to eliminate slippage when sweating.

2 NO BOUNCE

Snug, lightweight black frame with a comfortable fit that prevents bouncing while you crush your workout.

3 BLUE LIGHT BLOCKING

These lenses protect against the alleged dangers of blue light, making you look smart, (even if you're just spaced out at your desk).

4 ALL ORIGINAL

A classic frame shape with timeless appeal that will always be in style. (Unlike those heinous trends of the late '00s.)'

IS THERE A CURE-ALL ELIXIR IN THESE LENSES? NO.

The question isn’t whether or not these venomous black frames and clear lensed beauties block blue light. They do. The question is whether or not they stop headaches, help you lose weight, grant healing powers, cancel your student loan debt, and make everyone you meet fall deeply in love with you. Guess you'll have to try them to find out. Can you afford not to?!?!?!?!